Monthly Archives: May 2014

Protected: The Vexing Woman

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The Colourful & Artsy Letter

The final letter whose result was a tie to The Letter [View the poll here] was written by Ee Jane to me back in 2007 upon our graduation. Haha! Tak sangka our letters can also have same result. Say YAY to telepathy for now! xD

The letter was four A4 pages long and there are absolutely no empty space left! Hahahaha! I love long letters because they are always so thoughtful. I really can’t remember where, when and how did she give me this letter. It doesn’t comes with an envelope because I kept it in a special file. Until today, her letter cannot be folded at all because it came unfolded so I don’t intend to fold it as well =P…

She gave me the nickname Hunny Bunny and Polar Bear but until today, only Polar Bear stuck to me =P. It’s kinda true that nicknames that she gave people stuck to them but whatever nicknames we gave her, we will actually forget about it until we need to use it. The full story of her first paragraph can be found in the first paragraph of this post here. Good thing that I blogged about it before! =P

Kesian saya, first paragraph also sudah kena blame hahahaha! It is a norm now that whenever something happens, it is always never her fault. Everyone will either blame it on Nano or someone else =P. Seems like it is a good thing that our friendship circle expanded… Can blame someone else =P !! The number of times that we gaduh in Convent is EPIC. It is so epic that I don’t even how many times or even what we argued about! I guess we are both forgetful people so yea, sudah lupa hahahahaha! xD

It’s true that we trust each other a lot [For now] and I would never dream/think that she would do anything wrong to me. Even if she did, she is quick to admit her mistake. We both promised each other that we will always be on each other’s number one friendship list no matter what happened. I don’t know why and how we made this promise but I think it is all this sesat stuff that keeps our friendship till today.

I like how she says we are both meant to learn from one another. I learnt from her that having a big heart enough to forgive people is actually not that tough. I do admit that I am not the most forgiving person around but I try [And fail most of the time]. Also, I have learnt from her that we have to stand up for our own rights and speak up for ourselves if we are ever oppressed. I really salute this woman’s bravery.

Ee Jane just implied in her letter that I wasn’t very understanding hehe! I do believe that I am much more understanding now after being so ignorant and selfish for so many years. Haha! I think I wanna salute all my best friends [Past and present] for bearing with me. Today, I try to think more before I talk or do anything but it can be really challenging. I would say that I am very spontaneous and I will only think if I have to think. If I don’t have to think, I would not think at all.

Does this makes you wonder what I think about all day long? I think about money and other bimbo stuff if that pleases you! =P No la, sometimes I do think about people and the good memories 🙂 .

Reading this entire paragraph made me see why people love me so much. Rupa-rupanya I am so nice! Hehe! I didn’t even realize it okay! I did it for her because we are best friends! I took her cycling to a secluded area and we were happy that we explored a new place. Mana tahu… Balik rumah kena marah for our bravery. Now that I think about it, it was too silly of us hahahaha! What were we thinking about!!! Really tak pakai otak lo. Thank God nothing happened to us!

I am so sorry for being impatient and lazy. I always try to be more patient and less lazy but in the end, still very impatient and lazy =P… I can’t remember what concert we watched? Was it Malaysian Idol? O.O … That’s the only thing I could think up of! I miss the tom yam yee mee at Tong Shen but now sudah tak ada. Uhh… So sad! T____T !!!

Oh yea, Ee Jane and I created a world called Pluto because it is the furthest planet from the Sun [Correct? Lazy to check Wikipedia hahaha!] and we are like the outcast in class. We didn’t really bother anyone else and don’t remember anyone existed until they join our world/madness =P . Good thing that she sedar I did more work and she dictated me around hahaha! Step, it is your turn now!!! =P !!! Enjoy it while it last! =P

Her first P/S is epic. Hahaha! She knew that I would blog about it one fine day and I did so after 7 years xD ! Last last in the surat still must blame me =X But if she doesn’t blame me, then she isn’t Low Ee Jane anymore xD !

And she too, dedicated an entire page of drawing to me! The drawing is on our little adventure la. More details below!! =D

Everyone… This is me dragging her around everywhere whenever she is not feeling well or just plainly lazy hahahahaha! I can’t really think what is she lazy about apart from doing homework and copying notes but I believe sure ada punya just that I can’t remember right now. Please confess!

This is us eating tom yam yee mee at Tong Shen! The clay pot is too recognizable! Hehehe! I am guessing she is the girl on the left because her pinafore is always hanging down one side sebab too longgar =P.

And this is Ee Jane being my dentist because there is a fish bone or something stuck in between my teeth *Paiseh*. Ah… Now semua tahu this hal T____T !

This is us pergi jalan-jalan! xD I am guessing she is the one on the left because the mata got more cat feel and errr, I don’t wear jacket out punya hehehe! Am I right?! xD

I wanted to share this Chinese New Year card with you guys because it is handmade by Ee Jane. I haven’t properly go through my stash of cards so I am sure there are more handmade cards. Hehe! Isn’t it cute?!

The interior of the card! =) Isn’t it lovely? I really love it! Oh ya, her other nickname is Sugar Stick but no one ever calls her that. All in all, I hope that you have enjoyed my cards posts a lot because I DO have a lot of fun writing about them! All this thoughtful cards and letters will always bring back memories of friendship which I have forgotten. So I guess, it is not only pictures that can paint a thousand words but cards and letters too can paint a thousand pictures. I really do appreciate everything that people gave me and whenever I am upset, I would read it back because I can feel their love ❤ 🙂 .

The Letter

There is a tie between The Letter and The Colourful and Artsy Letter in the poll. Right now, I will first write/disclose The Letter because let’s save the best for the last [The best between the two tie letters] ! Hehehe!

The Letter is actually an unsent letter. It was a letter written by me in reply to a then best friend’s letter. The letter was never given to him because I feel that he simply isn’t worth it. Our friendship went through many ups and downs because of his stupidity. Today, I consider this friendship gone because I really had enough. There are reconciliation efforts taken by this best friend but I can never bring myself to reciprocate this effort. Mainly it is because I don’t want to be hurt anymore and I do not want to be reminded of his extreme stupidity.

This letter was written back in February 2009. If the then said best friend is ever reading this post, I really don’t know how he would feel! Imagine getting a reply that you have been waiting for back then 5 years later!

He wrote me a letter and honestly, I was very surprised when I received it! Anyway, his letter wasn’t very pleasing la. He wrote it very nicely but I guess, he didn’t know that the content of the letter is hurtful. Even today when I read it, I was reminded of how obvious he made it that I was just an option and never a priority. I stuck around being friends with him because I value our friendship enough.

In his letter, he mentioned that our friendship is blessed by God and he hopes that I will give us a chance to be together. In all honesty, I have never thought about being with him at all [For now] because the kind of closeness that we share is only at the friendship level. At the point of writing that letter to him, my feelings were mixed up because there are so many things to worry about. STPM is at the end of the year and there are quite a few issues in friendship to be solved at that point.

In his letter, he mentioned his ex-girlfriend and the entire story disappointed me. I am okay with you liking me [In fact, I will be surprised] but I hate it when you take me as a rebound and perhaps, you see it as an easy way out. To me, this is one of the worst friendship betrayal you can ever do unto me. I have always felt that feelings don’t fade away as easily and many times, I can sense how people feel but I just don’t say it out.

Even until today, some best friends told me that if I ever date him, he would love me very much. I do agree but I am also very sure that his extreme stupidity will annoy me 1038373832919 times. Apart from that, I will always be reminded that how he goes after me because I am the best friend who is always there for him. The latter will scare me off enough. Hahaha! Sudah kena blacklist for now.

Even until today, I still love my freedom very much. In fact, if I am ever restricted, I would feel very miserable. For now, relationships are not for me. It confuses me all the time – did I bring the wrong attitude/mindset into a relationship or I happen to meet the wrong/dumb guys. I really don’t know. Mel is right, I am very afraid of falling in love so the moment I realized that the guy is not as good as he seems to be, I would be very glad and thank God for it [Based on a real story].

I realize that I would ignore and try to walk away from any friendship that has potential to turn into relationship. It scares me very, very much although people say it is good to marry your best friend. In my case, I am afraid of crossing the border of friendship and bringing it to love relationship. What if it didn’t work out and we are left with nothing?

The final part of the letter will not be uploaded because I mentioned his name and this is supposed to be anonymous! Hahaha! So whoever who knows this person, don’t say a word 😉 Just keep it to yourself. To be fair, I will type out the final part of the letter below:

…once in a relationship, there is a limit to everything that one does. I just hope that you understand that I am not fit to be in a relationship right now and we should just remain as best friends =). 

Please don’t wait for me, it will not be fruitful… I don’t want to waste your time. Just trust me, I am not the one for you. There are many more things I wish I could tell you, but I think it’s best that it was left unsaid. But anyway, we will stay as best friends! Okay? =) Take care. 

Reading back this entire letter reminded me of the many things I have been wanting to tell him but I didn’t dare to because his opinion might be biased and prejudiced. I can’t remember if I ever tell him about it but right now, it is no longer important. He used to be one of my best friends whom we never get bored of seeing one another but today, it is never the same anymore. Also, I completely did not intend to reply the last part of his letter because it spells desperation.

This entire post reminded me of a genius advice given by Nano to me recently regarding some people in my life right now:

His feelings might be true but his stupidity is unacceptable!

Such a true and wise piece of advice which I never except to hear it from Nano.