There are many things that I wish I could tell you face to face but I didn’t want to because sometimes, I just don’t want to hurt you. But again, I cannot let this go on anymore because I don’t want to end up fighting/not talking to you again because that is just so childish.
Right now I know, I have to make it clear to you so that you will not misunderstand me ever again. First of all, please do not say things such as:
Hope is somewhere in the thin air for me to grab it.
It is GOOD to be optimistic and positive but then, sometimes we have to be realistic. I don’t want you to waste your time and I don’t want you to hurt my feelings anymore by telling me that you haven’t given up hope on me because I know, what you say isn’t true because you still cannot forget the other girl.
It is not good to be in love/like another girl when in your heart, the slightest image of the other girl has not fade away. Because by this way, you are making me feel like as if; I am a replacement of her and that I am living in her shadows; a remedy for you to heal your heartache.
Please do not misunderstand me that I have the slightest feelings for you just because I typed out all this. I just wanted to make things/myself clear once and for all. I do not want you to misunderstand me or to think that there is hope for us to be together. I do not have any feelings for you and I have told you that even if you are the richest man in the whole world, you are never in my consideration.
All I wanted is for us to just be best friends like how we are back in 2008. Now, I am telling you honestly; the reason why everytime you asked me out and I refused to was because I didn’t want to go with you [and do not want you to misunderstand me] and not because I hate public transport.
Here’s another truth: I am always traveling with public transport most of the time when I am going out with my friends.
Once you SMS-ed me and asked me on how could you ever forget about the other girl and you asked me- will by falling in love with someone else helps. This incident had disgusted me because all that I see in you, is just another desperate boy for a girlfriend.
You can tell me that you are not desperate and all, but deep down; that is how I feel and see you right now. Sometimes there are things that I do not understand and I wanted to ask you but then I didn’t dare to anymore, especially when it involves another guy.
I realized that you are much more encouraging with your words back then, but then now, whenever the situation involves another guy, I sense jealousy, resentment and your answer is biased.
I want you to realize and to see that we are only friends and nothing more than that. We can be best friends and still, nothing more than that. Because to tell you the truth; if I want to find a boyfriend, that boy has to be someone whom I will be proud to to hold his hands in front of my friends and someone whom I will be proud to to show him to my parents.
I am not saying that you are a major embarrassment but just, I know that I cannot be proud walking and standing next to you holding your hands and to tell the world that I love you.
You have to find someone who will take the effort to colour up your life and you too in return, have to make the effort to make the other girl’s life colourful. I will not take the effort to pick up a paintbrush and to even pick the colour to colour up your life. I will only colour up your life as a friend/best friend and nothing else more than that anymore.
No matter what our classmates/schoolmates say about how compatible we are or how we should be together, I still stand firmly on my own opinion which is, I know we shouldn’t be together no matter how compatible we are because I have no feelings for you so please do not take their words seriously as an encouragement.
I am not discouraging you but I am telling you nicely and making myself clear that I do not have feelings for you so please do not keep any feelings for me as well because the feelings that you are having for me isn’t real at all.
Of all, I am just typing/saying all this in a nice way because I don’t want to be rude and hurt your feelings so please don’t force me to say things which aren’t ear pleasing at all and I don’t want to argue with you again because it’s tiring, boring and childish.
Lastly, I hope that you have totally understood what I am trying to say in this post and I am sorry if I have offended you in any way. So after this post, if you have any doubts; please do not hesitate to give me a call/SMS and I will give you a clear explanation because I don’t want you to go on living in doubts and I don’t want you to use that doubt as a ray of hope.
No matter what happens, just don’t be so desperate because that is just too immature. Take care and all the best to you in your future undertakings.
Yes, X is a real person but I am not telling you who. If you know who it is, then congratulations! =P If not, then feel free to leave a comment! =P